Extremely frustrated and hurt

Pat, I'm a retired Social Worker and when I spoke of a new form of emotional abuse I was referring to the types I had seen in my work not at home.
As i understand it Home Health can send in a nurse once a day which doesn't address the problem my need to get some hours of sleep at night so I can't stay up and monitor his med taking. When he is rested he can operate well enough. So I think he can do what I'm asking still. He is not doing what he needs to do when he is functioning to stay that way.
I am going to ask for a psychiatric assessment of his functioning because I may be mistaken about his competence. Julie

Don't fevers and low blood sugars befuddle the brain cells to the point that one cannot be responsible?...I would relate what he's doing to his doctor and maybe Medicare can send in a nurse several times a week to at least give you a break?
The fact that you said he's come up with a new form of emotional abuse makes me think he has a history of this when not ill.
Julie...get some emotional help for yourself and certainly relay his patterns to the doctor.
So sorry for your distress......(my father put me through lots of that and i understand how it mentally breaks you down).......Pat

Julie,

You are in a very hard spot. I do feel for you. You should not have to be the only one to care.

Remember that he is an adult and you are not his Mother.

Once again, I feel for you. I've been there.

You are doing all that you can for him.

Best regards,
Rosemary

Dick had a rough time last week. He ran fevers every evening, he had several episodes of low blood sugar and he stays up way too late and then is sleepy all day. Each of these affect his ability to stay on track with what he needs to do. I told him last week that his job is to take his insulin on time and to make sure he is well rested. I said that that would make my job easier.

Sunday night he stayed up until 4 and I had to wake him at 6:30 to get ready to be at the Cancer Center by 9:30. He was so sleepy that he could not stay awake and did not even get the essential tasks done. We were 15 minutes late. I had reminded him several times that Monday was a full day with 4 appointments and I wanted him to be rested. I was so angry at his lack of responsibility.

I told him he was sabotaging his goals by not taking care of himself. He translated this to mean he was sabotaging me. i restated the message. Last night when I went to bed at midnight he had his pills set out and his insulin to take. I got up twice to prod him along. Then I fell asleep. I woke up at 4 and he still was not in bed. I told him I am profoundly disappointed.

He is so passive about everything and i am the one who gets anxious about him getting to appointments on time. I feel stressed all the time and is I wonder if he really means what he says when he says he wants to live as long as possible. His behavior says otherwise.
I am at the point of telling him this has to change or I'm done. I feel like he has come up with a new form of emotional abuse.

Tearfully, Julie