What I did for myself today!!!

Ginger,
All of your information is helpful! I had been told about the meds and stool softner and the lack of finding food pleasant. I realize everyone heals at different rates, with various degrees of pain, so it is nice to have a range of when to expect things to improve. This entire process is difficult to plan around but that is understandable. Thanks for the support!
Sally

Sally, here's the story on med's, it all depends on how he is doing, they are on pain med's if they still need them for a week or two. Then about that time the bowel thing starts, ask your doctor what he should take for regular bowel movements. In our case it was milk of magnesia, also a stool softener. Its important that they don't get dependant on the milk of magnesia or any other helper. He may not have this problem at all. Some get out without any problem others have big problems. Driving is 4-5 weeks, could be 5-6 depending on your doctor. After a week or two after he is getting stronger get him out for small drives, just to see something else, it all helps. I hope this helps..Ginger

Ginger,
I appreciate the advice about having his buddies around. Friends have asked what they could do, and I suggested to call once a week to stop by and visit. Believe me, I will take the hint and leave the house while they are visiting!

Meds for several weeks? I did not know that part. So, how long on the pain meds?

Caregivers, while out christmas shopping pick up a little something for yourself, anything for a little pick me up!!!!GO TO LUNCH WITH THE GIRLS!!!!or bring a nice lunch home for you and your loved one, light some candles and a fire, only if you have a fireplace, and remember all we have to be thankful for...hope it snows, Ginger

Sally, One other thing that helps is to have your house in shape for returning home, Gene has an outside bag so we set up the master bath will all his stuff. If he has friends who he is close to, like a guy he plays golf with or something, I think its great if you can alert them to stop in when he gets home, that perked Gene up seeing his buddies even if for a half hour...then if you need to you can run out to the store.....Ginger

Sally,
In our situation we had a nurse, stoma nurse twice a week for 6 weeks, I stuck around the first month, but I asked the kids, our daughter and son to come over on days they could to break up the bordem.We walked and did what we could,for the first month, then I left him when getting a hair cut etc. They can be okay for a few hours but I called while out.Gene is 66 and in good shape, but they are on some med's at first so I didn't want to leave him until he was off those. I think our being with them feels right to them, rather than others. Gene's sisters came over and his brothers but not for lenghty periods. So I stuck it alone pretty much,the best thing is when they can drive, even if its just a short trip somewhere. It was summer for us and we have an inground pool. so the grandkids would come over and give him some laughter to get him thru, and the fall was great so the weather certainly helped. The first month is a bear for both!!!!No driving for at least 5-6 weeks for them......Ginger