I\'m Baffled

I lurked for about a month prior to R/C, gathering information.
I was too freaked about the whole deal to post, and found most of my answers by just reading threads.
I had nothing to offer.
After R/C if felt at least I had something to offer. I had a really good time helping Duke along.
I am proud of you Duke.
I still feel bad for Rick.

I think BCAN has 50 times the members.
Small is good. You have a good core group here.
It's the Pat & Mike show, with comedy by George.

Remember to have fun. No fun is BORING.
I'm not talking a monkey sex thread, but too technical all the time is BORING also.
I can always read Urological Journals for that.
Some just need a laugh, to forget about their probs for a bit.


Best, Jim

I keep coming back because of Lisa, Claire, Leigh, Susan, and our former moderator Zachary. They fought an elegent battle..some of them too late in diagnosis, some with a return of the nasty cancer which has no discrimination whatsoever. We really need to do something about that..so far only the mice are getting the best treatments. Someday and i hope i'll be here.
pat

Hi Pat

I agree this website is "the bees knees" in bladder cancer information. The other main site is much less accurate, more into "feelings" and has by far a different feel to it, but I can't say the other is better.
When I was first dx'd I did lurk a tad, but not for long. The cancer was more rare and more advanced, and complications were a bumper crop for me. Time to learn would have been a luxury.
It has been 4 years all over the map - dx, turbs, rc, neo, chemo, cdiff ( a few times), bone tumors, failed neo, illeal conduit, etc. After all that has happened I can say I am a well educated medical consumer thanks primarily to Wendy S and Wendy R, Cynthia and especially Pat Now I try to offer help when I have something to contribute. What hinders me is all the losses - Claire, Susan, Leigh and Lisa especially. I got really close to them on & off site and now I struggle with survivors guilt alot.
I know I should be posting much more than I do. I do admire you Pat for the diligence and compassion you have for each and every one who finds this website. I just haven't got a grip on things yet I guess. Love ya, Holly

We are Unique indeed.... The Great part I am not so sure about.

I am so glad i posted this question. I have learned so much about everyone and their process in getting comfortable about posting. I LOVE these stories. And Motomike i had almost forgotten about the first couple of months with my Indiana and how many times i cursed it out and i didn't have a forum then..surely wish i would have. I had a great mentor and she kept me assured that what i was going through was normal. And now when i see all the commercials for incontinence i am so smug...don't have to worry about a prolapsed bladder!!
You guys are all so great and unique.
xxxxooooo pat

It was probably a month post surgery when I surfed in. My surgery had been successful and I was cancer free but why didn’t I feel great? I had a bag superglued to my belly and I didn’t know how to deal with it. I was emotionally splattered. I hated the bag. The stoma seemed determined to make my life as miserable as it could! My stoma was like an uncontrollable kid. It waited until I had clean dry skin, ready for the new bag then it would squirt and I would be back to redoing the cleaning and drying. I would go into a rage.

I read threads for 5 days and nights (all-night several times). I goggled words and abbreviations I didn’t understand. I lurked for at least another month. I got to know some of the regulars. I followed newbies. I learned. I slowly realized that the stoma and the bag were not the problem- I WAS THE PROBLEM! {groan}

Web sites are very different. I hate learning a new site.I'm not the most patient person around but I really liked the support aspects of the site & was determined to offer support to those in need of it. If all I have to offer is just I AM A SURVIVOR then that's what I'll do.

Pat, there will always be those who will lurk until they have gleaned enough information to deal with the future stuff. They will not post and probably never register. This does not indicate that the site only reaches a limited number. I'm sure great threads are here for many to read and deal with what lies ahead.