Welcome Helen,
My wife Heidi found that she felt she was more a part of the team when she started to go to my appointments with me and keep notes on what the doctor was saying for me. She also makes sure that I write everything that happens in my medical journal.
After I came home from my TURBT I had to wear a catheter (really hate that) so I couldn't get around very well due to it pulling on me when I moved. She helped me get comfortable in my recliner and then set up a schedule so that I would have someone there to help me, and to make sure that I took my medications on time while she went to work.
Now she keep everyone posted as to how things are going on her Facebook page. My family and children love to get the latest news right away.
But most of all she is strong for me when I start to hear that little guy in my head trying to scare me, and beat me down. She reminds me that I am usually the strong one. And that its okay if I hide in her arms until I find my strength to fight again.
Our love for each other has only grown from all this. We are not fooling our selves. We know that the worst could happen at any time. But we have prepared each other and our family for when that day may come. We also never ever go a day with out telling each other how much we love one another.
We learned all of this by watching my mother when she had to help my father with his bladder cancer. Dad waited far to long to get help and the cancer took him at a young age. Thankfully, now we are able to better detect it and treat it.
So when you catch your breath, and you feel that you are ready. You will find that you are the greatest, and most powerful part of his team, in his eyes. He will need you. So now is the time for you to shine. And I know that you will do just that.
May God guide you and your husband along the path to becoming cancer free.
Mark
