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We are in trouble

7 years 1 month ago #43664 by GKLINE
Danielle

My heart goes out to you. All I can think of is the "Team" that goes through the sickness together. Your husband is lucky to have you. I am sure he knows it.

The suffering is felt by both the patient and the caregive..... and sometimes the caregiver(partner) is more affected than the patient.

This is a team sport after all. Keep your faith going and remember, we always have room for ANYTHING you would like to talk about.

Sincerely
George

Light a man a fire and he is warm for an evening.
Light a man ON fire and he's warm forever.

08/08/08...RC neo bladder
09/09/09...New Hip
=
New Man! [/size]

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7 years 1 month ago #43662 by mmc
Please do let me know. We are all in your corner!

You are an inspiration!

Mike

Age 54
10/31/06 dx CIS (TisG3) non-invasive (at 47)
9/19/08 TURB/TUIP dx Invasive T2G3
10/8/08 RC neobladder(at 49)
2/15/13 T4G3N3M1 distant metastases(at 53)
9/2013 finished chemo -cancer free again
1/2014 ct scan results....distant mets
2/2014 ct result...spread to liver, kidneys, and lymph...

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7 years 1 month ago - 7 years 1 month ago #43661 by CatherineH
Oh Danielle... my heart hurts for you and your brave husband. I am deeply sorry that he has been through so many complications, and I know you are going through it all right there beside him. He is truly a fighter and is an amazing man (but you already know that!)

Thank you for sharing the wisdom of your experience with others about the importance of not ignoring early warning signs, and about the value of optimism. It makes a such a difference to read those words from real people like you. You are very kind to offer such personal insight about his case not being typical. You are a true "care" giver.

Please know that you will never be a "misery" here. You are part of our family and we are so hoping that he will have a turn for the better very soon. I hope for encouraging news on Wednesday... and as you have already wisely said, we must always have that hope.

Hugs to you both,
Catherine

Best wishes... Catherine
Forum Moderator Team

TURBT 1/21/10 at age 55
Dx: T2aN0M0 Primary Bladder Adenocarcinoma
Partial Cystectomy 2/25/10
Vanderbilt Medical Center
Nashville, TN

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7 years 1 month ago #43654 by upnorth
Hang in there Danielle.

You are a good example of how caregiver should be. You are doing the right thing by comeing here to vent. Everyone needs a place to escape to, and just say how they really feel.

I wish I could make you feel better, but I don't know what to say. Just know that we are with you, and are praying for you both.

Mark

Age 55
Diagnosed BC 12/20/2011 Ta No Mo 0a Non-Invasive At age 48
"Please don't cry because it is over..... Smile because it happened!" {Dr. Seuss} :)

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7 years 1 month ago - 7 years 1 month ago #43653 by danielle
Thanks Mike, I appreciated your reply..Just felt so distressed when I posted.
We have always been so optimystic with this illness...We have had 4 good years and happy times together with our children and 6 little grandchildren...inspite of all that was going on...

It's not an easy passage and I must stress to other newbies here, that they must always look on the optimystic side.What has happened to my husband is not a common thing to happen, so please don't take his case history as an example..He ignored the warning signs that something was wrong...For over a year and a half he kept the secret of the blood in his urine...

Take each day as it comes and love your life for what you have..Until today, my husband is optimystic and I shall make sure he stays that way..I had to fight with him this afternoon, not to climb the ladder to change a burnt out light bulb...Having hope and strength of those loved ones around you makes it all bearable...

I was feeling very low today, and as I can't show him what I am feeling I turned to my friends here...We all have a breaking point when uncontrollable sadness creeps in, but holding out for your loved one must be the priority...Your strength supports them...

Again thanks for listening
Danielle

Mike we shall be at the Oncologist on Wednesday and then see what the future holds...I shall post after the visit to the Onco and let you know...Thanks.

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7 years 1 month ago #43652 by mmc
Danielle,

So sorry about how things have gone. Sounds like it has been a long and difficult time and it sounds like there have continued to be a lot of good times mixed in with the bad over the recent years.

I sincerely hope they are able to do something about the situation for your husband.

I so wish I had some great wisdom or insight to share but sometimes with this thing we are reminded that we only have so much knowledge and so much power and sometimes it isn't a lot at all.

Live strong!

Mike

Age 54
10/31/06 dx CIS (TisG3) non-invasive (at 47)
9/19/08 TURB/TUIP dx Invasive T2G3
10/8/08 RC neobladder(at 49)
2/15/13 T4G3N3M1 distant metastases(at 53)
9/2013 finished chemo -cancer free again
1/2014 ct scan results....distant mets
2/2014 ct result...spread to liver, kidneys, and lymph...

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