One piece of information that may help you convince him....
Explain how this is all very new to him, but not to us. We've been through it. Pat's been researching for 8-9 years. I've been researching for a few years. Others here have been researching for much longer than I have.
The research has shown (not just ours, but the research of doctors over the years) that the biggest predictor of the most positive outcomes is being treated at a top bladder cancer hospital with top doctors. Experience matters and that's what they deal with every single day, many times a day. The multidiscipline teams they have make a difference. The puliminologist (as Will and Pat mentioned) is the one to make the call in conjunction with the rest of the team about his candicacy for surgery.
Oncologists do not have the same experience in dealing with bladder cancer.
Good luck in your discussion with your father!
Mike
Age 54
10/31/06 dx CIS (TisG3) non-invasive (at 47)
9/19/08 TURB/TUIP dx Invasive T2G3
10/8/08 RC neobladder(at 49)
2/15/13 T4G3N3M1 distant metastases(at 53)
9/2013 finished chemo -cancer free again
1/2014 ct scan results....distant mets
2/2014 ct result...spread to liver, kidneys, and lymph...