Linda,
Where there is life, there is hope. You obviously haven't given up or you wouldn't be here at the forum. You have warrior spirit, and as Bill said, God is right there by your side...you have only to ask Him to provide the grace and strength you need to continue to see you through this ordeal. And we here on the forum, are more than willing to offer what support, encourgement and comfort we can. And ones like Pat and Cynthia can give you links to trials, etc. that may be helpful.
Please tell us more about your situation. Where do you live? What was your stage/grade? How long did you do chemo and what kind? MVAC? How many doctors have you seen? It's so critical to get several opinions and from the very best physicians you can find. Were they they very experienced in the field of bladder cancer? It's usually the major medical centers that seem to really know how to manage BC...and even then, I, as well as plenty of other gals, have had to wait in rooms filled primarily with males over 50 dealing with prostrate issues.
Anyway, we are here for you. You are still young and that is an advantage. Try to focus on whatever positives you have going for you. As bleak as it may seem, there are always positives.
Are family and friends there for you? It's tough for caregivers to always know how best to help us warriors. We have a "caregivers" section that you might refer them to and which might be helpful to them as well.
You might want to visit my website...you will find it at the bottom of my signature at far left bottom. I will be praying your journey finds you gaining positive momentum and peace of mind. Sending you big hugs,