Hi,
You just may find that the majority of members on this forum that have had cystectomies have either had pouches/continent reservoirs or neobladders done and that ileal conduit recipients are in the minority here. However, I think this is due to the cross section we have, younger people, people with the means to get the latest techniques done. But I suspect that in reality there are many more "ostomates" than neobladders or pouches running around, as this is the preferred technique for the elderly and the elderly make up the majority of bladder cancer patients.
To be sure, I see that younger men are more motivated to get neobladders along with nerve sparing surgery, in the hopes of preserving erectile function.
Some people say it's simpler to have the external pouch/ileal conduit done, that it has less of a learning curve and one never needs to self catheterize. It has its own problems like skin irritation, but they do sort themselves out with time and finding the right appliance.
If you want to get more info on what its actually like to have an ileal conduit, you might do best at joining a group specific to 'ostomy' and 'urostomy' in particular.
We have quite a few pages on the main site that discusses some of the issues involved in having an ileal conduit,
blcwebcafe.org/urinarydiversions.asp
blcwebcafe.org/ilealconduits.asp
and if it's not too much of an overload, there are some interesting facts about bowel sections used on the cystectomy page, towards the bottom. The amount of side effects are directly related to the length of bowel removed or used.
All the studies comparing quality of life have ended up saying that all 3 options are equally well received by patients. I suppose that is because there are choices, and patient choice is the most important thing barring unforeseen complications where someone's choice is not possible due to the location of the cancer.
All the best,
Wendy