For female of your age, either neobladder or Indiana pouch is often chosen over ileal conduit for the urinary diversion. The urologist I know who does neobladder surgery often only offers Indiana pouch for female patients. I have read that there are more complications mainly with incontinent issue with neobladder for female than male. Anyway, you have plenty of time to learn about it and decide what type of urinary diversion you prefer and suit your life style.
T2 is the earliest finding of the tumor which has progressed to the muscle tissue of the bladder, consequently the over all survival rate is the highest among muscle invasive. So, this is good news.
Your concerns of your spreading is valid, but because they caught you at the stage T2, it has lesser chance of metastasis. To address possible metastasis, by that it means that microscopic cancer cells which cannot be seen even using diagnosis such as CT or PET, it is likely that your doctor will recommend you to go through neoadjuvant (pre-surgery) chemotherapy first to kill potentially metastatic cancer cells. Neoadjuvant chemotherapy has been shown to improve over all disease free survival rate and it is strongly recommended by American Urological Association in its 2017 publication of the guidelines for muscle-invasive bladder cancer. Listed the link to the guideline. See the link below.
Going to the hospital which performs many urinary diversion surgeries is a must, and choosing the doctor who had
performed many times of your choice of urinary diversion should be taken in to your consideration.
Best wishes
www.auanet.org/guidelines/bladder-cancer-non-metastatic-muscle-invasive-guideline 
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