Glad the little victories are taking place for you. Recovery takes time and effort. Sounds like you are on the right track.
My 84-year-old Dad changes his appliance twice a week in order to avoid infection. He makes sure that his skin around his stoma is oil free and clean-shaven and completely dry after showering before he changes. I know what you mean about the medical community not knowing much about ostomy management. I can't tell you how many nurses have said to my Dad, "Oh, how long have you had your colostomy?" It is as if they've never heard of urostomy. Whenever he has been hospitalized, he is pretty much on his own for changing his appliance and hooking up to a night bottle. He brings his own supplies, etc.
There is a great website at
www.uoaa.org where you can register for free and post questions. There are people there with all different types of ostomies. If you need help with something, post and someone with lots of experience can help you out.
Hope you continue on the healing path. Keep up the good work!