Greetings everyone and good luck!
Had a sonogram about 3 wks ago where in it showed something (?..A growth?). I am a VA patient and 100% disabled for mental condition. Got sent to Urologist and tomorrow I am going to get a cystoscopy as well as a CT w/ contrast. Certainly not looking forward to it but have faced and lived thru much scarier things. Since I have been involved in 3 long term care of buds I served with dying from what ever type of cancer caused by Agent Orange disease and several friends but not involved with their care. AO seems to manifest itself in so many kinds of cancer it like a roulette wheel as to what kind of cancer you get but also like the roulette wheel, if you stick around long enough you're going to lose anyway.
My experience with these guys has been exhausting as to long term care and some of the guys refused treatment and died sooner but painfully...well...all of them died painfully. My dad died in 1959,when I was a boy, of leukemia that I believe was due to radiation exposure while in the army during WWII. There was no treatment then. My buds who had chemo had, IMO, ruined what time they had left..life was prolonged and miserable. It made me real hard over about chemo and I will not take it. It was suggested to me, by Dr. reading sonogram, that he was pretty sure it was cancer but 'scope and CT would confirm. He suggested to me immunotherapy.
Having read up on it and reading some what here, side effects aren't much if any different to chemo, so I would like to know the diff if any of you can advise me.
I'm 75 and had a life most men wouldn't even think about let alone dream. Quit making friends yrs. ago cuz the attrition rate of losing them hurts too much and I just don't want to get involved. Recently married to a lady I do indeed love but we also made a deal. Since I have no one in my life, She is to help me die and she gets all my stuff and $$$. We've had a yr. and it's been good but I have so many health issues in the past couple of yrs that this cancer issue is just another thing...IBS, CAD, Bundle branch block, CHF, suddenly full blown diabetes and now insulin dependent, GERD, and a few other physical things and all kinds of drugs to treat these various things, PTSD, sometimes severe and apparently bi-polar...that catchy little trendy phrase to boot. I'm just tired of it all and don't want to stress my wife out in a long term care position. I may be putting the cart before the horse since I will know nothing definitive until tomorrow.
All that said, I'm wondering the diff between chemo and Immuno or just no treatment at all. I feel pretty good tho I always am in some kind of pain, say about 3-4 everyday and, naturally limited because of age et al. I never expected to make it past 20 but, some how, here I am.
I would very much appreciate your collective advise about chemo, immuno and no treatment. Like if no treatment how long, roughly, do I have until my quality of life becomes nonexistent. The Drs. etc are all great cheerleaders telling me bladder cancer is very treatable but due to my experiences "very treatable" does not mean successful. For me, I learned long ago that hope is cruel but that it also is a human condition. Considering all my ailments, what would be the point of hope in the 1st place and at 75, about 55 yrs. more than I expected why would I even torture myself with hope? In a few weeks, my wife will qualify for about half my disability compensation. That, along with the value of my assets and S.S. and Medicare will ensure she will not be eating cat food in her old age...she's 20 yrs younger than me and I have encouraged her to seek out another partner after I'm gone...or maybe even before that. I just want to die at home and with my wife and not die in some facility alone. Man plans, God laughs..
Thoughts?