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Father About to Undergo Radical Surgery

13 years 6 months ago #4560 by Patricia
OK i'm confused......it is my understanding that Medicare must be the primary insurance after 65...his secondary insurance will pick up what Medicare doesn't. I don't think he can switch that around.........i certainly wish i could as my secondary pays way more than Medicare on my supplies i need. You do not need a referral with Mediare.
Look Harley you've got the ammunition for your father...he seems reluctant to have this surgeon do the surgery......a little time does not matter....he hasn't even been staged due to a lousy pathology report which means the doctor probably did not get enough for the pathologist to analyze. Read MZ's history of her 2 urologists and how she was treated and thankfully she listened to the knowledable people on this site and got herself to Mayo and now has a new neobladder...and is very happy with her results and her surgeon there. She was seen very quickly. She went to Mayo the week before she was to have surgery in the Wisconsin area.........
Look your father sounds reasonable...if you give him the facts along with your brother either he listens or he doesn't but it sounds to me like he's on the fence right now anyway....give him an intelligent nudge..............Pat

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13 years 6 months ago #4555 by Rosie
Harley girl, Baylor Hospital does have very high marks for patient care. If you are unable to get your father to call the number I gave for the urology department at UT Southwestern and follow through with processing - (evidently his insurance company is the one that is complicating the appontment process) I suggest to ease you and your brother's mind do research on the urology department at Baylor and also call the urology/oncology department to talk of your concerns. It is certainly touching that you and your brother want the best care for your father as you see it but it is still your father's choice as how to proceed. Evidently your mother accepts it. Here is Baylor All Saints Website. Seems like they are very invovled in urology and oncology. http://www.baylorhealth.com/locations/allsaints/

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13 years 6 months ago #4551 by harleygirl
My Dad is scheduled to have surgery at Baylor All Saints Hospital in Fort Worth.  When I called UT Southwestern last week, I was told that I needed Dad's social security number and also insurance policy number before they would even talk to me. Then some kind of patient form had to be completed and forwarded to a patient acceptance board (or something like that) and, at some point, all his records would be needed before they could decide whether to take him as a patient. Sounded time-consuming and complicated to me. Why can you not just call a doctor and get an appointment?? He has opted for an insurance plan called Secure Horizons instead of Medicare and I think it is an HMO.

I live in Dallas, not too far from my parents who live in Ft. Worth. I have a younger brother who would also like for Dad to find another surgeon, which is especially difficult for my brother since it was his idea that Dad go to our current urologist for a second opinion. We are both at a loss at how to approach Dad and tell him that WE would be more comfortable if he were to seek treatment elsewhere. Are we being selfish? I don't want to anger my father and have him think I am butting into his business. He is certainly capable of making his own decisions, but I don't think he knows all his options. All he knows for sure is that he has a date set when this awful disease will be removed from his body. Who is to say that if we could get seen at UTSW that it would even happen before his current surgery date? One thing I can't ask him to do is delay treatment any longer.

IF I could get him in at UTSW quickly, perhaps I could approach him by saying that he's not doing anything anyway, so let's go see these guys in Dallas. He wouldn't cancel his surgery date so if things didn't work at in Dallas he would still have his surgery date that took so darn long to get. To me, that would be win/win.

My mother just turned 77 and is still very active. However, her attitude is that Dad made his choice and that's that. I have taken it upon myself to contact a stoma nurse to find out if Dad should see her before the operation, even though the surgeon didn't recommend it. My brother told me today that Dad said yesterday that he wished he had never told the current urologist that he would let him do the surgery. I'm not sure if that means he wants to get care elsewhere or no care at all.

When he had decided to seek care at MD Anderson and was waiting for the referral to go through, Dad seemed content and happy about the decision. Sure, there were some things that would have to be worked out since care would take place in another city, but we were getting all those "housekeeping" details worked out. Then the local urologist called and the local surgery was back on all of a sudden. Now Dad apparently regrets that decision. I want to impress upon him somehow that IT IS NOT TOO LATE TO CHANGE HIS MIND. But I have to have concrete options, not what-ifs.

Thanks to all for your support and concern. It helps to have the wisdom and experience of those who have gone before.

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13 years 6 months ago #4546 by Rosie
Harley girl and all. If father does not see things the way she and we do given the input we have from Harley girl's side of the story, there can be no further convincing. I did call the urology campus clinic at UT Southwestern appointment desk and talked to Lynda. She told me medicare patients do not need a referral, people with other insurance carriers can self refer .The only time a referral is needed is when a person's insurance provider states a referral is necessary in order to be covered. If your father is interested in pursuing what seems to be a much better medical treatment than what you say he has, I urge him to call UT Southwestern Medical Center urology department at 214-645-8765. He may be concerned (as I was intitially) that he would be hospitalized at Parkland Hospital which is one hospital in the UT Southwestrn group but I was hospitalized at Zale Lipshy, an excellent private hospital in the center. What hospital is her currently scheduled for his surgery? Rosie

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13 years 6 months ago #4544 by Patricia
Harley..heed Rosies advise. Do not worry about the time element....like i said before ..the CT scan, pathology reports, and even slides are available to you at the hospital they were done....It took me one day to get them after requesting them to take to New York. And its ok to get 3rd or 4th opinions. But its most important to go to a major center that does this kind of surgery on a regular basis. The delay depending on a reliable path report will be expedient to the circumstances. Its a huge operation and YES a huge paycheck. The center Rosie is recommending is very close by...let her help you. I hate to think of the results if he's not cleaned out properly and the fact that the urologist said " he's worried about both"!!!!!!! Where do you live in relation to your father? Is there another member of the family in the household you can join with on this?...........Your father would be better off doing nothing than letting this guy touch him......just my opinion. Everyone on this site has probably had more than one opinion and they have all found caring compassionate surgeons who treat them with respect...your father deserves no less............Pat

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13 years 6 months ago #4541 by Rosie
Harley girl, Pat and all, Yes I think I could pull strings to get your dad into see the very qualified team at UT Southwestern but it would have to be your dad's directive and desire to do so. Have you given him the qualifying information I gave you as to how, what and why there is a difference in urologists, centers, surgery, treatment, etc? If you have and it has not given him any concerns there is really nothing more you or I can do to drag him to UT Southwestern Medical Center. I would be glad to try my hand at giving him infomration and differences through email if you want to give him my email address. I will PM you my direct email address. I can't think of anything else to do for someone "who just wants to get it over with." My husband said the same thing when he was originally scheduled for open surgery to have his kidney and gall bladder removed. I had more power to demand he look further into UT Southwestern and laporoscopic by stating to him that I was unsure if I would be able to take care of him the 4 to 6 weeks recuperative time necessary after the open surgery. Who will be taking care of your father, post surgery? If it is your mother, does she feel the same as you about the doctor?

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