09z,
Glad to see you are getting the 2nd opinion at Memorial Sloan as it is certainly the top place in the area with the top doctors that know this bladder cancer treatment inside and out and can help you with everything. Good luck with your treatment and do keep us informed about how everything goes.
It will be good to also post the information from your pathology reports when you get them but you may already understand everything from your talk with the doctor.
It can be a very scary time, but hopefully, once you get to the right place with the right doctors your anxiety will come down. It is the fear of the unknown that is the biggest thing.
Once you understand exactly what stage you are, and have it confirmed and know the treatment plan, you will likely feel better than you do now.
Good luck with everything!
Age 54
10/31/06 dx CIS (TisG3) non-invasive (at 47)
9/19/08 TURB/TUIP dx Invasive T2G3
10/8/08 RC neobladder(at 49)
2/15/13 T4G3N3M1 distant metastases(at 53)
9/2013 finished chemo -cancer free again
1/2014 ct scan results....distant mets
2/2014 ct result...spread to liver, kidneys, and lymph...