Oh Katie, I am so sorry to hear about your mother. She is lucky to have you by her side.
At this point, as the doctors have told her, it is either the surgery or nothing. It would, of course, depend on her age and state of health, but if the doctors are recommending an RC they must feel that she would be able to deal with it. The surgery is a major one, with a relatively long recovery time, but once that is over the cancer should be GONE. Many people live very long and fulfilling lives after.
Things to ask the doctors?
1. Is this a realistic prospect given her age and physical condition?
2. What diversion are they recommending? There are three major types, but the simplest both surgically and recovery-wise is the ileal condiut where the urine is diverted into an external bag.
3. Is there any evidence that the cancer has spread beyond the bladder? That would make an RC almost irrelevant.
4. I don't quite understand the 10-15 years comment. IF the cancer is confined to the bladder, an RC would be a "cure."
If your mother chose NOT to do the surgery, what is the prognosis? Not just years, but quality of life, pain and discomfort?
I am sure that these few questions will stir more in your mind.
Wishing you both all the best
Sara Anne
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