Mum newly diagnosed, I can\'t stop crying

Thanks Melodie, I've checked out your webpage and it helps me believe mum can have a future after the RC, albeit somewhat different. I've already had wonderful support from many people on here, in particular Pat and Betsy Mae. In fact, Betsy Mae rang me this morning and we had a lovely chat.

I wish I could just gather you all up and put you around my mums hospital bed, so that you can tell her to be strong and she will get through it.

Best wishes
Moglie

Moglie,

The feelings you have are very natural so you need not apologize for being human. After all, this is someone who must be very close to you and this kind of news is very disturbing and painful to all involved. You want to be strong and yet you hurt just as much as everyone else. Where and how do you find your strength? Since I have been a cancer warrior and not a caregiver, I can only guess how you must feel. And I'm not sure what advice to give. I think, in many ways, cancer can sometimes be harder on the caregiver than it is on those who have it.

As the patient, we are in control to some extent; as the caregiver, you have less control as you have to allow the patient to make their own decisions and sometimes they are not the decisions you would make. If you haven't done so already, you should explore the section of this site that talks about caregivers. I will pray for you during this very difficult time. I'm not sure it gets any easier. Sending hugs across the ocean.

Hi All

My mum (she's 66 yrs old) has been told she has invasive bladder cancer and has to have an RC in the next couple of weeks.

The close family, which is me (the only daughter) my husband, my brother and my dad.

I feel like I'm the only one trying to keep everyone thinking positive and trying to keep everyones chin up - but no one is doing that for me. In private and when I'm not with mum, I just break down crying ALL the time. It was 3 weeks ago we heard the diagnosis, when does the initial shock finish, I just feel so exhausted and its only been 3 weeks.

I'm sorry if this sounds pathetic compared to some of the heartbreaking stories on here.

Thinking of everyone on here who is struggling with the consequences of bladder cancer.


Moglie
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