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Husband newly diagnosed…and I am already exhausted…
My husband is newly diagnosed, and I am already exhausted…there is so much information, family visits and general running around trying to make him happy…and I could use some input on how to handle everything..
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2 Replies
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I know exactly what you are going through, but please know that there is life after diagnosis. My husband was diagnosed almost 13 years ago. After many biopsies and treatments over the years he has had good checkups and is on a yearly visit with his doctor now. We know it can come back any time but just enjoy the time we have together and thank God every day for the good care he has had. Blessings to you.
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As someone that has been diagnosed with BC, I would like to say something. I don`t know the particulars of your husband`s diagnosis, but I can tell you how I feel watching both my mom and my fiance doing things to make it easier on me. I am starting to feel like I am made out of glass and that this cancer is defining who I am and it`s just a small part of what makes me, me. Unless there is a physical reason why your husband is not able to do things like before, please let him. I feel guilty watching my 75 yr old mother do my dishes, or try to vaccum or insists on taking my laundry home. I feel awful when my fiance` comes home after working all day and immediately thinks he needs to start doing something to help me out. I feel quite useless at times and that`s a horrible feeling. So, if he is able to do things, no matter how small, ask him to help you and then let him go at his own pace. Accomplishing anything will do you both some good and bring some kind of “normal” back, even if it means sitting in the chair and him fold his socks and underwear.
As far as all of the information goes, yes, there is a boatload and it is definitely overwhelming! There is a site called CaringBridge that you can make a free account and post any info you want family/ friends to know about. You just email the link to them and they get notified when something new is posted and can even respond back. It has been a great relief to me to have this, because I only have to post it once and everyone that I want to stay updated is.
Last, PLEASE take the time for yourself. You must take care of you in order to help take care of him. Make plans to hang with friends and have someone stay with hubby if needed. Stepping out of the cancer box can do wonders!!!
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