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father in-law recently diagnosed
Hello, I am new to this message board- actually new to any support forum.
My father in-law diagnosed with invasive bladder cancer. he is 77 a very active 77 yr old skiing,softball recently ballroom dancing lessons!
He needs to make some decisions- he recently underwent his 2nd TU resection. His doctors are recommending removal of the bladder. we did get all 2nd opinions and it seems consistent with what to do next.
He doesn’t want his bladder removed-we (his family) want him cancer free and feel this may best thing -as far as we know it has not spread anywhere else.
He seems to want to go the chemo/radiation route but based on his case- the stats don;t sound promising- they are ok but it sounds like most people go through rad/chemo and have to have their bladder removed anyway.
We are trying to get him in a positive mind set going forward -because we think he actually have a better quality of life if he did one of the bladder diversions.
thanks for any responses,patti -
14 Replies
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Patti…sounds more like he has hydronephrosis…an obstruction of free flow of the urine from the kidneys to the bladder from what you’re telling us of the tube that is in and bag…what is causing that is another thing but i would certainly seek out an explanation of it rather than just take out the kidney..thats pretty extreme. Pat
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Hi Patti, Did you give a grade and stage? How invavsive, threw the bladder wall? I hope for the best your fil, 77 and ball room dancing, Hell i cant even get threw a slow dance without crippling my better half
Joeburg55 -
Patti if it were my FIL I would make him sit down and you could show him what to read on this board. Without the removal of his bladder his chances are slim if not nill. As I mentioned the radiation is a 50-50 chance if that. And also then the BC could spread and that would not not be in his best interest, I think you get my drift here. Any surgery is a risk but leaving his bladder in is a bigger risk if he would like to buy some more time in this crazy world. Wishing You The Best, Joe
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Patti,
I had my bladder removed almost a year ago, and although I’m younger than your dad (50), I’m sure he’ll do fine. It takes a bit of getting used to, but humans are remarkably adaptable.He may have one round of chemo afterwards if it hasn’t spread, or if it has–in my case it had–he may have several rounds.
Is he having the surgery at a hospital where they do this often?
Zach
“Standing on my Head”––my chemo journal
T3a Grade 4 N+M0
RC at USC/Norris June 23, 2006 by Dr. John Stein
Joe, thanks for your input- I think my fil is going to have his bladder removed- although he is reluctant maybe just scared but we believe since he is healthy otherwise- no medication this is a good decision to just be rid of the cancer.
I wonder if they do chemo after surgery? just to make sure it doesn;t go anywhere else? we will have to ask about that.
Best wishes to you -we have a tentative date for his surgery june18.
thanks for responding to me- everyone is so genuinely caring it seems to offer any info or just a kind word.
I just wish he would come on this forum – maybe we can have that as a goal for him- I think it is a generation thing- haha
Patti this sounds to me that the cancer is invassive like mine and also grew into the ureter. My tumor was rather large at the top of the bladder and part of it 3cms grew into my left ureter. They put in what they call a doulble J-stent and that opened up my ureter and my left kidney is functioning normal due to that and I am now done the chemo which helped even more. The ureter they decided other then the stent to leave alone and not biopsy till my surgery which is now June 20. I am 52 yr old male and on the 5/17 I am scheduled to see the cardioligist just to make sure everything is up to par for the surgery. I told the Dr who is doing the surgery after being dx on 1/6 and all the tests and chemo and then the MRI of chest, pelvis, and abdomen to see if chemo did it’s job and it did if I didn’t have a heart attack yet I should be good to go he got a kick out of that. The best and safest call here is to have the bladder removed even though now they don’t see a mass on my bladder. You can’t be sure if there are any cancer cells there and I am not taking that chance period and as I mentioned there is still a problem and growth in my left ureter. My Dr. said if I were an 80 yr old man I might consider radiation but that is a 50-50 chance. So if your father-in-law is in as good as shape as you mentioned here I would suggest having the bladder removed. Like any surgery there are risks involved and this is an intense surgery so thats why they may offer older folks different options as I said the radiation. I seen older folks like your father-in-law that may be 77 but look and act like there 55 lol. So I would say go with the removal of the bladder and be done with the cancer. Best Wishes, Joe
Hi wendy,
I probably used the wrong word- no he did not have his kidney removed- I am not exactly sure what is wrong with his left kidney but it is not functioning like they would like it to ( this is after his 2nd TUR)- they were going to put a stent in but didn’t he now has a bag which is temporary.
If he has an RC – which it looks like that is what he is leaning towards then they would possibly remove it then.
Hi Patti,
I’m confused, a nephrostomy is a kidney removal, I thought. Do you mean he’s had some other kind of kidney disease, they are afraid of complications and want to remove it to be safer? What was wrong with the kidney?
If in doubt, seek out a second opinion or third, from the best uro-onc surgeon you can find.
Wendy
Thanks to Jean- your experience has given us some insight.
Does anyone know or have experienced kidney malfunction with bc? my FIL had a nephrostomy (left kidney)and the Dr. is thinking he should remove that kidney if my fil has the removal of the bladder? he (fil) doesn’ have to do that but they are afraid it will shut down completely and then they will have to do something with his kidney..down the road
Patti,
I am 72 and had my RC 6 months ago. From the time you are diagnosed to your final decision is a very difficult time and this board made it bearable for me. I thought about the chemo/radiation route but after a lot of research and reading Cynthia Kinsella’s story (look at Cynthia’s corner) I decided on the surgery. She is a much younger woman and gave it a good fight but ultimately lost her bladder anyway. From what I read the outcome is much better with bladder removal. Yes, it is difficult to wrap your head around all of it but this board really helps. Those who go before you have all kinds of helpful advice and it really helped me make my decision just reading all the stories everyone had written. There is an older gentlemen in Canada named Keeta who comes on once in a while and he had an RC and is doing very well. Others my age are also doing well so if your FIL is healthy he will do well.
I was caregiver for my granddaughter and greatgrandson before my surgery and was very active. My strength is coming back slowly but surely and my 6 month Cat Scan results were good. I had my moments but all in all life is good.
If he does decide on the RC make sure you have a really good surgeon who does a lot of these operations.
I wish you and your family strength as you make these difficult decisions.
Blessings….Jean
thanks so much for the responses! and for the info you provided wendy.If we have more questions I will ask.
we will know more in the next week or so. We will look at the posts specifically for men too, thank you.
patti
Hi, welcome on behalf of your father in law, who is lucky to have you.
Lately there have been articles published saying that the elderly have higher complication rates after bladder removal, stressing the importance that one be in very good general health to qualify for this surgery. Given the fact that most blc occurs in the elderly, they’d better have some good alternatives!
The chemo/radiation/”combined modalities” treatment your FIL desires is a very rough protocol, many scopes and follow ups, a lot more coming and going to the cancer center, and also requires that a person be in very good health otherwise, plus the tumor must be solitary, not blocking a ureter and preferably in the dome of the bladder. There are strict qualification criteria. We have a page here:
http://blcwebcafe.org/combinedmodalities.aspAll the being said, the patient’s choice should be the first concern. I just hope he’s in good shape and can benefit from whichever treatment he chooses with the least trouble possible.
Wendy
Hi Patti,
Sorry your father-in-law and family is going thru this experience. although I am female and 42, I have had RC and neobladder just in March of 2007. My surgery was done robotically at Mayo’s Rochester. Any major plumbing changes are tough mentally and physically. And I feared it, but I feared a bladder full of cancer more. Dr Blute said I was their star with a most rapid recovery inspite of 2 episodes of c diff. There is a section here for men – maybe posting there will get some more relevent input for your father-in-law. Folks here are most genuine and helpful.
Let me know if I can help and God Bless, Holly
Patti,
I am hoping that someone who’s had a RC will jump in here soon. The message board seems a little slow lately, but hopefully, someone who has been in your father-in-law’s shoes will jump in before long. Just from the outside looking in (I have not had Radical Cystectomy), I would say that if the docs are willing to do the surgery at his age this fact alone is very promising. He must be in very good health other than BC. This is a strong point, and lots of people have learned to live without bladders very happily. I hope that some of them will pipe in soon.
Your friend,
Rosemary
Rosemary
Age – 55
T1 G3 – Tumor free 2 yrs 3 months
Dx January 2006Sign In to reply.
