Personality changes after treatment?

4 years 11 months ago #57253 by sara.anne
Replied by sara.anne on topic Personality changes after treatment?
I agree with Jack. However I would suggest that somehow (not easy, I know) you get your husband a complete evaluation by his primary care doctor. Sometimes when we have something like bladder cancer we ascribe everything that happens to this malady; it is possible that something else might be going on. Sudden behavior changes can be warning signs, just as urinary blood or chest pains. While it is likely that this is a reaction to the stress of being diagnosed with bladder cancer, it is also possible that there are other things happening.

When I was diagnosed I became very angry when both my urologist and my primary care doc suggested I need treatment for "depression." After all, I thought, didn't I have the RIGHT to be depressed? We all package our emotions differently

Sara Anne

Diagnosis 2-08 Small papillary TCC; CIS
BCG; BCG maintenance
Vice-President, American Bladder Cancer Society
Forum Moderator

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4 years 11 months ago #57251 by Jack R
Replied by Jack R on topic Personality changes after treatment?
Frannie72

May I suggest that you and your husband get a referral to someone who can help resolve what may be one of the many recognized issues of dealing with cancer. We can all put on a brave face only so long before the stress builds (firsthand knowledge here) and needs to be relieved.

Bringing up the subject of needing and accepting help can be a stressful situation in its own. I suspect that the treating urologist/oncologist will have already noticed an issue and have a ready referral.

Some stressors that were discussed with me, in my situation, included:

"Cancer Survivor Guilt" as a recognized issue for some who are successful if their treatment.

The question of what to tell the kids, relatives and friends about the cancer diagnosis. Do you share the diagnosis, give daily updates, or say nothing at all to anyone ?

The disruption to a planned life - to the patient and those around her/him can be extremely stressful. There is a possible lack of control of both the current and future.

It was not surprising to me that so many of my cancer treaters constantly ask, "How are you doing?", "How are your wife and children doing?"

Reliable websites with some information .

www.health.harvard.edu/blog/the-mental-and-emotional-challenges-of-surviving-cancer-201103282146
www.mskcc.org/blog/guilt-lasting-side-effect-cancer-survivors

It helped me to get it all out in the open.

Best,
Jack

6/2015 HG Papillary & CIS
3 Years and 30 BCG/BCG+Inf
Tis CIS comes back.
BC clear as of 5/17 !
RCC found in my one & only kidney 10/17
Begin Chemo; Cisplatin and Gemzar
8/18 begin Chemo# 3
Begin year 4 with cis
2/19 Chemo #4
9/19 NED again :)
1/2020 CIS is back
Tried Keytruda, stopped by side effects
Workin on a new plan for 2021

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4 years 11 months ago #57250 by frannie72
Personality changes after treatment? was created by frannie72
My husband, high grade T1, finished first round of BCG recently, scope was all good, will start another 3 week round in May. He tolerated treatment very well. Lately, he has become surly and just not himself. At first I thought it was the shock of the diagnosis, the surgery and treatments but now I don't know. I thought he would be happy treatment is going well and is working but he has outbursts about feeling "cheated" in his life and how his family is not treating him well and he's just being negative all the time. I honestly am flabbergasted, it is not like him. Could this be a side effect?

We have not told our children (yet) and I've tried to maintain life as usual, maybe I should tell them so they can be aware and maybe not bicker over the TV remote?! My hope was for him to go through treatment, they would never need to know and we could move on with our lives but maybe I should explain their dad is going through a stressful time and that is why he is acting this way?

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