Frannie72
May I suggest that you and your husband get a referral to someone who can help resolve what may be one of the many recognized issues of dealing with cancer. We can all put on a brave face only so long before the stress builds (firsthand knowledge here) and needs to be relieved.
Bringing up the subject of needing and accepting help can be a stressful situation in its own. I suspect that the treating urologist/oncologist will have already noticed an issue and have a ready referral.
Some stressors that were discussed with me, in my situation, included:
"Cancer Survivor Guilt" as a recognized issue for some who are successful if their treatment.
The question of what to tell the kids, relatives and friends about the cancer diagnosis. Do you share the diagnosis, give daily updates, or say nothing at all to anyone ?
The disruption to a planned life - to the patient and those around her/him can be extremely stressful. There is a possible lack of control of both the current and future.
It was not surprising to me that so many of my cancer treaters constantly ask, "How are you doing?", "How are your wife and children doing?"
Reliable websites with some information .
www.health.harvard.edu/blog/the-mental-and-emotional-challenges-of-surviving-cancer-201103282146
www.mskcc.org/blog/guilt-lasting-side-effect-cancer-survivors
It helped me to get it all out in the open.
Best,
Jack