Lynn:
I think we all share the same anxieties to varying degrees about the quarterly cystos. You are not whining! Some people try to deal with it by convincing themselves that the news will be bad so that anything else is good news. Others try other things. Just know that every one of us worries about these cystos to some extent, usually with great anxiety. I'm sure you will hear from others about how they try to deal with it.
My only sugggestion is to do the best you can, try different coping mechanisms and see what works best for you. Don't assume that you will be able to eliminate the anxiety; it is a part of dealing with this disease (and life).
And know that we are out there thinking about you.
David
Male Dx T1G3 5/08 @ Age 59. TURBT 5/08; TURBT+40 mg MMC 6/08; BCG (6) 7/08-8/08; Cysto & TURBT 9/08; BCG Maint(3) 10/08, 3/09; 7/09; 11/09; 5/10; & 1/11. Clean cystos 2/09, 9/09, 3/10, & 10/10.