It's so hard but true that cancer treatments are worse than the disease. But don't forget that without treatments the disease would definitely rear its ugly head sooner or later, and it's not a pretty sight either.
I had nerve damage after my mastectomy for bc (breast cancer), went to the pain specialist at the cancer center and told her I felt fine until I got surgery and started treatments (anti-hormonals for 5 yrs....pretty tough, too). She said, "That's what they all tell me." When I had radiation, each week I'd tell the radiologist, "It hurts, it's tight, it's sore, I'm exhausted, feel sick, weak, etc" and he'd write in my file, "Everything is going very well."
Ah..the irony.
I have lived with chronic fatigue since treatments started in Jan. 2000. Even though they ended 2 years ago I have to plan around my energy level, my life is very different from "before", I'm a different person. Not the life of the party anymore but asleep before 12! I used to be just getting started at 12, it was my job (a singer/musician) and I'd get home around 5:00AM.
I had to ditch my 25 yr career because I had no choice and could not muster it up anymore. But I had a very good, long run and don't mind that it's over.
I hope you have a better recovery than I did. I know so many women with blc who had hard chemo like you, return to their jobs and lives and don't complain nearly as much as I do about the after effects of treatments. It is truly an individual thing.
It's said that exercise is the best way to beat fatigue....then I roll over in bed and think, "that's it for today!"
Thankfully I've found other ways to be happy, instead of staying out all night partying(working)I spend the day pursuing more sedentary ways of being creative...heheh.
I know that you have children, so that makes it a whole other ballgame, one where you can't really afford the luxury of being fatigued. That, plus the fact you were athletic to begin with are two things in favor of you being one of the people that have an excellent recovery, and get back on their feet. Motivation, children have a way of inspiring it.
But...it will take some time, so be patient and go easy on yourself. Enlist the help of those around you, let them understand how you are feeling. Don't even try to be superwoman now. Not until chemo is done and in the past.
Wishing you well,
Wendy