How do I get out of this....

I have been diagnosed with stage t2nx muscle invasive bladder cancer as of Aug 15 and I am a 49 year old male. I have been doing a trial with 3 months of neoadjuvent chemo at Sloan and am finishing up my last chemo in about a week. After that there will be a cystocscope and then the plan is a neoblader with prostate and lymph node removal. I don't know too much about what to expect although I'm reading the good and the bad on the internet. I am really hoping in a month or two someone in the world comes up with a bladder sparing option. My first chemo I had a bloody discharge and my urine has been running clear since then. I am really fearful of the loss of quality of life issues. During the breaks between chemo I feel so energetic and normal. It's highly stressful.