newly diagnoised and freaking out

17 years 4 months ago #1922 by mikmckna
Replied by mikmckna on topic newly diagnoised and freaking out
Hello,

I am originally from MI, 45 minutes north of A2. There are a few members that had their treatment at UofM and I heard wonderful feedback so your going in the right direction. Please keep in touch and know that you are not alone. I could not imagine feeling the way I do now, just 3 mos post op, when I came home from the hospital. Just think... HAPPY FACE AHEAD :D

Believe in yourself,
Mike
T1-G3, CIS
RC w/ Neobladder 8/22/06

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17 years 4 months ago #1901 by sghipart
Replied by sghipart on topic newly diagnoised and freaking out
WOW! Thank you all for your prompt responses. I am still freaking out but it helps to know I have a place to do it now. A couple of you made me laugh. Thanks it helps to laugh. I have an appt. on Fri. at U of Michigan to see if they will do the surgery there. I live in a small town where the only option is an external system and I just don't think I can do that. I am praying they will admit me right away and get this cancer cut out before it spreads any further. They seem to respond quickly to other cancers. Many people from my town go up there for treatment.

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17 years 4 months ago #1896 by seabay51
Replied by seabay51 on topic newly diagnoised and freaking out
Dear sghipart,
I am 51 and although a man I too experienced some of the same concerns you have. Let me say to you, you will not be any less the woman you are now. You can probably see by this site alone just how many people there are walking around out here with a neo bladder. In fact stop and consider how many people you have passed today who have had the procedure and you don’t even know it. I was diagnosed with bladder cancer and had the RC / neo bladder surgery on Sept 22 this year. I am now going back to work next week, most people return back to their normal lives sooner. The small life changes you will have to make will not be noticeable to anyone but you. Let me say that when I was first diagnosed I lived on this computer researching every thing I could find on bladder cancer and any related topics to do with neo bladders. I drove myself crazy! I am lucky enough to have a great doctor who answered all my questions and concerns. Make a list of questions for your doctor and don’t feel ashamed or embarrassed about any of those questions. Knowledge is great and will help you through this time. My heart goes out to you, I felt the same way and I am doing great now and so will you. I had my grandson over this week end and nothing has changed, he still love’s me as much as I love him.
All of us on this site know how you feel and are pulling for you.
Best wishes Steve

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17 years 4 months ago #1891 by Mike
Replied by Mike on topic newly diagnoised and freaking out
Hi,

to quote Monty Python - Always look on the bright side!

You are 54 and you KNOW you have bladder cancer just think if you had bladder cancer and DIDN'T know.

Now you can walk down the street with your head held high and have the certain knowledge that all those people you pass might have cancer and not know it but you KNOW and you are having it fixed! Do you realise that at the moment out of any 5 people you pass in the street 2 will have had or will get cancer.

This is not a disease to be proud, ashamed, indifferent or clandestine about. You very soon get over the natural embarrassment of its location - be it bladder, testicles, vagina, rectum or the tip of your nose - the damned thing has gone wrong and wherever or whatever it is it needs fixing. Hey I'm a 60 year old guy and I've had so many nurses peering up my penis I'm beginning to think they are doing a rerun of Bridget Jones' Diary in my bladder but this time with less clothes on! [then I got bladder cancer! Yeah dream on ;)].

Would you be ashamed if your leg fell off? Would that make you worried about intimacy in future relationships? If at 54 you have only your physical apearance to impress with I hate to tell you but you are already treading on thin ice!! Time and tide wait for no man and sure to hell gravity ain't kind! Anyway - anyone on the list whose leg fell off Paul McCartney has a vacancy ::)

This Challenge is just what it says on the tin A Challenge and one that will increase your personality, make you more able and willing to cope with the insecurities of others and give you a whole raft of new friends.

Always look on the bright side of life.
At least when you go to watch Life of Brian or Borat or any other really funny movie, after the op there will be none of the risks inherent for many women over 50!

When is your op? I'm having one tomorrow! Strapped up in gyny stirips with a bunch of masked bandits stealing bits out of my bladder whilst I watch the burning, boiling and cutting on a TV monitor! I'm so well known in the hospital I keep my trousers on in the canteen or people would remember my name fortunately its not the face they study most of the time - except in the canteen! :-/

I hope your op. goes well and in 10 years when the guy you are intimate with keeps sprinting to the toilet because of his prostate you will at least know that what goes around comes around! 8-)

There is nothing to be ashamed of, all that you have is bladder cancer - don't forget life is a sexually transmitted fatal disease, it is what you do with the symptoms in between that count!  ;)

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17 years 4 months ago #1888 by Rosemary
Replied by Rosemary on topic newly diagnoised and freaking out
My dear,

I am 54 and alone, but not raising my grandchild. I can imagine that this fact alone, would make you extra scared. I also share your concerns about intimacy, though so far, I have been able to keep my bladder.

Please stay with us, and don't be ashamed or afraid to share anything.

You might be surprised to find how connected you are to everyone else.

Hang in there.

Rosemary

Rosemary
Age - 55
T1 G3 - Tumor free 2 yrs 3 months
Dx January 2006

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17 years 4 months ago #1886 by mikmckna
Replied by mikmckna on topic newly diagnoised and freaking out
I am sure yur are freaking out but rest assured, it gets better. I learned I had BC and before I knew it I was having it removed. I chose a neobladder as well. There is a learning process but I was just thinking the other day that it's just become normal.

It would be too easy for me to say don't worry and all because I know it's impossible not to but do keep in touch. There are plenty of people here with all kinds of support and advice.

Believe in yourself,
Mike
T1-G3, CIS
RC w/ Neobladder 8/22/06

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