Introductions

Doug doesn't really like to discuss his bladder cancer with anyone beyond family and close friends. My advice -- share it with whom you wish and when you are ready. It is okay if only the important people in your life know about it. You hit the nail on the head -- "I don't want that to be what people see/think about when they talk to me." His thoughts exactly.

Best wishes,
Anita

Iwanara,

RD and Sara Anne have given good insight. My 2 cents worth is always one day at a time-as that is all we can really control plus you don't have a full diagnosis yet. Also, everyone is different in their situation and makeup. You will intuitively know who to tell & what is best for you and family plus that can change as you journey through this. For me, I told a plethora of friends and family initially as I figured prayer warriors, advice and other support would be good but, that is me. I also learned to live and move on. People on this forum will be here to listen, encourage, advise (non are doctors) to any question, rant etc you may have.

Also, MD Anderson is one our country's BEST cancer hospitals and is my backup if need be living in New Braunfels-which is 2.5 hours away. Doctors Kamat, Denney, Grossman among others are excellent in that department!

So sorry to hear that you are joining our group! Not that you aren't welcome, of course.

From your report, I assume that you haven't had a TURB (transurethral resection of the bladder...ie, biopsy) yet? You really won't know exactly what the situation is until this is done and you have the pathologist's report. MD Anderson is an excellent choice, BTW.

There is not much point in discussing the situation until you have the final diagnosis, because things can be different than they seem now. Once you know for sure that you have bladder cancer, and what its stage and grade is, then you can make those decisions. Your family and your children can be a great support system for you. And if they are NOT well informed, they may not trust you again!

I have a dear friend whose kids (grown adults) never tell her any of their health issues "because we don't want you to worry." So, she worries all the time and is never sure that they are telling her the truth! Likewise, she won't tell them anything because "she doesn't want to worry them." Need I tell you the result of all of this dithering around? It is a deeply personal issue, and one that you must be comfortable with, but I would urge you to think seriously about it.

Bladder cancer CAN be treated. You will read about many others on this Forum who are leading very full lives after their diagnoses. I wish you the very best of luck.

Sara Anne