When I am doing the BCG treatments and after the Cysto's, I get the pain after urinating also...for me it usally last a few days, longer for the TURBTS. Like you, I don't have the pain before or during, but it starts after and builds for 10-15 secounds and then fades suddenly....I hate it and it really makes me dread the trips to the bathroom. Like others have said, the anti-spasm meds help the best but until the bladder has healed up the pain stays.
As to how BC affects us...it's a pain in the butt, BCG and then the Kodak moments. But it becomes "normal" and not a big deal, hard to believe. More like annoyance that you have to schedule all this time to keep on top of it. Remember, as much as it stinks having to go through all this...it beats the alternative!!
Since I was diagnosed a year ago, two people I know were diagnosed with liver cancer and kidney cancer. One is already dead, the other has less than six months to go....bladder cancer isn't so bad when you look at the big picture.