I'm not sure I can add anything that hasn't been said already. I'm glad you found our family here. They are fantastic, a great support and a world of knowledge to be shared. Please come here and share your feeling anytime. There are many people that read these forums that will get educated and comfort from reading your emails but feel uncomfortable writing themselves. It sounds like have inherited some of the strength of your father. You situation has touched the hearts of many of us here and just know that you have our prayers. I look forward to your future updates.
dx - Aug 2005
Five reoccurences (last 12/09 Ta high grade)
BCG Started 10/09 (2 6wk treatment)
BCG Maintenance started 4/10
Dear Missy, I am a parent, grandparent and daughter who's father passed away this spring. The best thing you can do is give your father your love and peace of mind that you will be ok, and you will, you sound like you have a good head on your shoulders.
You are allowed to feel anyway you want and feel free to come to this site anytime you need to.
I have had bc and my husband has had non hodgkins lymphoma.
So I kinda know about being a caregiver and patient ,and what we both want from our three kids and grandkids is for them to have a happy life. we have tried to teach them about our strong belief in God and that as long as we give him control of our lives that in the end it will be ok, and we both believe in miracles. God bless you and your family it can be a very confusing time. Rocky
I am trying to enjoy every moment right now. I find myself conflicted though as I work full time and have 2 children (10 & 12) with full schedules. My parents live an hour away from me so it is not so easy to get to see them. My plan is to make sure that I do my best to balance things. I know I will need to work on being kind to myself as I am sure I will feel pulled in both directions. I am fortunate to have a loving and supported husband and very supportive girlfriends. I will do the best I can.
Missy, my father died in 2002 of metastatic bladder cancer. He had symptoms, but chose to ignore them. I'll never know what was going on in his head -- if he knew something was really wrong and didn't want to deal with it, or what. I still miss him. I'm glad your father is pursuing treatment, and I'll keep you both in my thoughts and prayers. Enjoy all the time you have with him.
My mother died in 1959 from breast cancer. I was 15. She and my family insisted that she was fine, just a female problem. This was before Hospice but she chose to remain at home with around the clock nurses. My brother and I were allowed to see her occasionally so we could be kept from the truth. She died at home. I so wish I had been told the truth so I could have been there for her. A different time and place.
Now I have bladder cancer. My daughter has moved back home. I sometimes suspect it is to take care of me instead of saving money to purchase house. And I don't really need to be taken care of. I am strong except for BCG treatment days and last week after 2 trips to the ER all of us, including doctor have decided no more BCG. SO back to yoga this week!
I guess I am saying, as a daughter and mother, take this time to love and cherish your dad. It may sound crazy but this time you have is a gift.
And keep coming back to us for those moments you need for yourself.