Lupenbill,
It sounds like you are right on track with most after receiving the initial diagnosis. It can take a few weeks for the results from a full workup - 6 weeks in my case - checking the whole urinary system (kidneys, ureters, bladder, urethra) for issues. Time seems to stand still just when you want things to happen right now. Time is on your side when caught early.
Telling the kids can be tough (mine are older). I waited until a treatment plan had been devised, with expected time to achieve defined results. Then I wrote the kids letters telling them that things looked good, and I would let then know if that changed. I wanted to avoid big discussions.
A younger kid, living with you will soon notice your new schedule. Once you have a plan you can reassure him that you are (expected to be) (going to be fine), but you will have some ongoing treatment. Cancer is such a scary word that a "bladder problem" may be a better term.
My wife is involved in all aspects, from driving to grilling the doctors for full explanations. Everyone needs an advocate for medical issues.
You might ask your doctor now, who he would recommend as a Urological Oncologist should you need one. You will have a better understanding of your situation shortly, and will have had time to decide if, once worked-up, you want to see a general urologist or a specialist in bladder cancer.
Best, Jack